Mike Penner transitioned a couple of years ago and started using the name Christine Daniels only to start going by Mike Penner last year again.
He was found dead in his apartment, apparently of suicide.
How much does this break a person’s heart? Plenty.
Our love to his family and friends.
It’s always sad when a person tries to find happiness and it eludes them no matter what.
It’s sad as he/she had so much to give to others to understand being trans not always so aboslute as a combination of both. And the reality of life during transistion is often not what the person envisioned for post-transistion, or they find themselves more of someone in between, something our society isn’t tolerant of someone living there.
I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a few, what I call, John Muir moments, where you’re caught between going back isn’t the answer and more likely leading to worse depression, and even suicide as what happened, and the fear of going forward, finding it harder than you thought or planned. John Muir wrote about a situation climbing in the Sierra Mountains, but it applies to any situation someone finds the same thoughts and feelings.
To transistion, many have to be unintentionally or intentionally blind to reality to survive both all the outside forces of society, family, money, etc. and your own internal thoughts and emotions. If you’re not blind, then the reality can be overwhelming, and even deadly. Rebuilding yourself during and after a transistion is harder than we imagine. It takes enough to survive, and some don’t.
I only wonder where his support and friends were. Not to blame anyone, just wondering. Contemplating suicide has signs we never see until afterward.
I don’t know Susan K, but she really nails it. I’ve been full time 7 years and even though I transitioned with or without the operation we are not “Female’. I think the onnis* is on Mike/Christine counsolers. About halfway into my trans I got that I wasn’t a woman but more of what the American Indians called their tranz “Of two spirts.”
Also the whole GLB”T” thing. A lot of my gay friends are against trans being lumped into that group..and me too! Trannys are different and Bisexuals are ,well dunno their just Bi and not so different. There are many, what I call non-movable words. Up. Down. Dead. Alive. We are feminine but not women.
Having said that I am happy being of two sprits supported by my family and dear born women friends. I know many disenchated post-ops.
Penner wasn’t straight (meaning liked men). Most likely was a T-lesbian. I didn’t know Penner but somehow Christine lost her way without the luxury of dismantling all the norms (whatever that is) that most regular folks place values in. That value that Christine wasn’t real or proper. Truth be know it’s hard work..Christine looked radiant in her pics and in Mikes pictures they all looked liked mug shots.
Almost every death in our world is tragic. Each child, each parent, each gay, and each grandparents is sorely missed by those who charised them.
Bye Penner I know your sweet sould is in a better place than this.
Katherine@omegaframeshop.com