May 3: Would Have Been

It would have been my parents’ 61th wedding anniversary today. And just in time, I discovered this word:

Ya’aburnee(Arabic): “You bury me.” It’s a declaration of one’s hope that they’ll die before another person, because of how difficult it would be to live without them.

(There are nine others that we don’t have in English, here. I’ll be blogging later just about the term saudade.)

My mother just told me that she regretted she never got to take care of my dad, that she never got to be of service to him once he was unable to take care of himself. & You know, folks, it just doesn’t get more heartbreaking than that. So despite my joy that she is still here, I feel a little guilty that she lives with a hole in her heart, without him.

She also said. “I had nearly 60 years with him, but I’m greedy, and wanted more than that.”

Happy anniversary, mom & dad. & Thanks for setting that bar high. Dad, we miss you more than you ever would have imagined.