Category: feminism

Posted on

It Was Rape

I was lucky enough to catch a screening of Jennifer Baumgardner’s new documentary It Was Rape. Eight women tell their stories about their experiences with sexual violence.

These experiences are so complicated, and even for these interviews you can hear all the women trying to make it less of a deal than it is and than it was. Why?

It’s entirely worth watching, but make sure you’re in an okay head space if you’re someone who has had this kind of experience – or even if you haven’t.

One of the women is told by one of her friends that “any time anyone has sex out of someone out of fear, it’s rape,” and that’s a good reminder, for everyone. And oh – this isn’t just for women. Men should watch this, too.

 

Posted on

I Love This (Fat) Woman.

I love this marvelous fat woman who wrote this article called “How Not to Be a Dick to your Fat Friends”.

First, because of her awesome hair.
Second, because she’s written things like this:

Almost inevitably, other women chime in with things they dislike about their own bodies. Then it feels like an evening spent rolling around in self-loathing and if I wanted to do that, I’d go to a Coldplay show or something. (I kid, I kid. Mostly.)

The funny thing is that this is meant to make other people feel better about their bodies but can have the opposite effect. If our bodies are similar, for example, and you’re telling me how gross your thighs are, that’s going to make me wonder a) why I’ve been sitting there content with my thighs when they are obviously so flawed and b) what you think about my thighs that you haven’t been telling me.

Really, because it’s true. We teach each other how to hate ourselves in more detail-oriented ways every day.

& This:

If you ask me about my cholesterol, I will totally tell you, my friend! But then I need you to believe me, OK? And if I were dealing with high cholesterol and you said, “Hey, I hear that walking for half an hour a day can help with that, let’s go to the park!” then I would totally be on the trail with you because walking at the park for half an hour with a friend sounds awesome.

Since we all live in a “wellness” obsessed culture, may I also add that it’s really stupid to assume that fat people don’t exercise. My mom was on her feet her whole life; she was also overweight her whole life.

(And may I just say, while I’m on the topic, that “wellness” is a dumb-ass word. The word is “health”. There is no way to use “wellness” where “health” isn’t appropriate, and oh, health is a word, and wellness is not. Soon we’re going to start calling morals “goodnesses” as our intelligence as a species drops down to an IQ of 80.)

and also, this:

Special note to other big fat fatties: This is also not cool to say to your smaller fat friends. See above, re: identity politics. “Fat” is harder to define when it’s those liminal 12-16 sizes but come on. Let’s not be dicks either.

As someone who has seen everything from size 6 to size 14, I am very much in the liminal category. Of course I also don’t say dumb ass things like “god I’m so fat” to women who are bigger than me. Or smaller than me, really. I don’t think of myself as fat, for the record. The horror.

I’m going to add a couple of others: skinny ladies, do not imply that I only have this fantastic rack because I’m a size 12. The last time I lost 30 lbs I went *up* a cup size, not down one.

Also, do not look surprised when I mention having been a gym rat or being able to do 50 pushups. One of the reasons some of us are not skinny is because we’re muscular. (We often end up with higher BMIs as a result, though I’ve been spared that indignity, at least.)

This post brought to you by someone cranky from trying to drop a size, if you really need to know.

Posted on

Writing, Women, & the Web

Chapters are needed for this upcoming book:

Women, Work, and the Web: How the Web Creates Entrepreneurial Opportunities, Book Publisher: Scarecrow Press

Co-editor: Carol SmallwoodCo-ed., Women on Poetry: Writing, Revising, Publishing and Teaching (McFarland, 2012) on Poets & Writers Magazine “List of Best Books for Writers.” Writing After Retirement: Tips by Successful Retired Writers forthcoming from Scarecrow Press.

Co-editor: Joan GelfandDevelopment Chair for the Women’s National Book Association, member of the National Book Critics Circle, Joan blogs regularly for the Huffington Post, teaches writing, and is an award winning author.

Seeking chapters of unpublished work from writers in the United States and Canada for an anthology. We are interested in such topicsas: Women Founding Companies Existing Only on the Web; Women Working on the Web With Young Children or Physical Disabilities; Woman’s Studies Resources and Curriculum Development Webmasters; Women as Founding Editors of Webzines and Blogs; Surveys/Interviews of Women on the Web.

Chapters of 3,000-4,000 words (up to 3 co-authors) on how the Internet has opened doors, leveled the playing field and provided new opportunities for women, are all welcome. Practical, how-to-do-it, anecdotal and innovative writing based on experience. We are interested in communicating how women make money on the Web, further their careers and the status of women. One complimentary copy per chapter, discount on additional orders.

Please e-mail two chapter topics each described in two sentences by March 28, 2013, along with a brief bio to smallwood@tm.net  Please place INTERNET/Last Name on the subject line; if co-authored, paste bio sketches for each author.

Posted on

Virginia Woolf

“Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and a lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul. She becomes all outer show and inward emptiness; dull, callous, and indifferent.”

On January 25th, 1882, Virginia Woolf was born. Happy Birthday Mx. Woolf!

Posted on

Roe v Wade Turns 40

Statement by the President on Roe v. Wade Anniversary

On the 40th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, we reaffirm its historic commitment to protect the health and reproductive freedom of women across this country and stand by its guiding principle: that government should not intrude on our most private family matters, and women should be able to make their own choices about their bodies and their health care. Today and every day, my Administration continues our efforts to reduce unintended pregnancies, support maternal and child health, and minimize the need for abortion. On this anniversary, we recommit ourselves to supporting women and families in the choices they make and redouble our efforts to promote safe and healthy communities.

40 years of keeping women alive.

Posted on

Barbie Vagina

No, really: you can get surgery – called “The Barbie” – to remove your labia minora so you can have a ‘tidy’ seam of a vagina instead of – well, a regular one. For those of you who don’t know, pussies are like snowflakes: no two are the same, with variations in color, size, texture, hairiness, size of clitoris, position of the vagina (the actual opening) and shape of the minor and major labia.

It’s one of the things that people who really love female genitals seem to find endlessly fascinating. (Note: not all women have female genitals, and some men do.)

I’d like to propose that any man who does these surgeries considering getting “the Ken” – where a man’s penis and testicles are melted down and smoothed into a tidy lump.