My very lovely sister Kathleen turns a new age today. (It’s not my decision whether or not she wants anyone to know how old she is, and I’m no fool.) She has been very, very supportive of my writing for years now in both practical and emotional ways.
One night, a long time ago, when we were sharing an apartment (read: I was living in her apt), I wrote a short piece about my parents, in honor of their anniversary, and left it for her when I went to bed at whatever godforsaken hour I did. She worked for a bank most of her life, and got it when she woke up a few hours later. When I saw her next, she was holding it in her hand, kind of gesticulating with the pages, and said, “So you just sat down and wrote this, just like that?” I shook my head yes and watched as the lightbulb went off over her head; I’m not sure in all of her years of banking it had ever occurred to her that someone would sit down and write a short story for no reason whatsoever.
It was like our own sororal cultural exchange: not too much later, she sat me down and taught me how to write a budget. As it turns out I’m excellent at writing them; it’s keeping to them that’s the tricky part.
But a very happy birthday to you, Kath!
Bleary-Eyed
I was hellbent on finishing a complete draft tonight, and though at one point I was actually wondering whether I intended to write “horse” or “house,” I did it. I may wake up tomorrow and decide that nothing I wrote in the past few hours makes a damn bit of sense, but the important thing to me, right now, is that I have the shape of the whole book.
That said, there is still a lot more work to be done, so I’m off to sleep. It’s nice to get to bed early enough to squeeze in an hour or so next to my honey.
Three Months, 15 lbs.
I am back to the size I was when we got married in 2001, which is nice. My goal is to get to the size I was when we met in 1998, though. We’ll see.
Still, I recommend myfooddiary.com for anyone who’s an otherwise bad eater. It’s nice to know what it takes to eat recommended amounts of fiber, calcium, iron, Vitamins A & C.
I’ve also since decided I prefer a 15-20 minute workout daily as opposed to 30-40 minutes every other day, especially since I work out at home (a combination of weight training, calistehenics, and yoga).
Belligerent Old Ladies?
I had a bad dream about an elephant a couple of weeks ago.* I’ve had a couple of dreams in a row about not being able to keep animals safe (another one involving a calico cat), if anyone feels the need to be Freud – and after this one I woke up haunted by the idea of unhappy, angry elephants. I’ve always liked elephants – they’re peaceful, smart, social, familial. They talk to each other, and they’re otherwise playful and peaceful, even in the most extraordinary circumstances. As a way of purging my bad dream, I started wondering if there was anything I could do, and I came upon www.elephants.com, which is the website of The Elephant Sanctuary.
The Sanctuary takes in old circus elephants. It can only take females (because males don’t socialize with others), but it gives them free range, good food, and a safe warm place to sleep. Plus, friends – the other elephants, dogs and cats, their caretakers.
Elephants occasionally get labeled “dangerous” like Topsy did – usually when they have the good sense to smack down a mean trainer or two – and Winkie was one of the ones who did. At upwards of 7000 lbs., “aggressive” can mean “fatal” in an elephant. But since she’s retired, she’s been entirely peaceful, with no signs of aggressive behavior. There was just something about her story that speaks to me, so I thought I’d share it.
They keep blogs of the doings at the Sanctuary – both African & Asian – and it can be pretty heart-warming reading. I just really love the idea of these formerly cramped, chained-to-a-post, performing animals laying around, taking baths, eating berries, and occasionally chasing dogs (a game for both the dogs and the elephants, apparently). Like there’s some justice in the world, sometimes, for at least a lucky few.
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* The dream was a result of my having discovered the sad and unjust execution of Topsy the Elephant. Please don’t read the story at all if you’re fond of elephants, REALLY. I’m warning you. Her story has haunted me for three years, since I first read about the memorial to her at Coney Island. The short, leaving-out-the-gruesome-details part of the story is: badly-treated performing elephant kills three men and is electrocuted by the famous Edison, who was trying to prove that his form of eletricity was safer.
I Should Say…
… not only am I putting up a preview of the new book tomorrow, but I’ve also found that while I’m writing I can’t just toss off ideas about gender for the blog. Thus, 80s music and all the other oddball things I’ve been posting about.
Painful Posting
Someone remind me not to get embroiled in threads about anything for a while; I’m in pain all the time pretty much and as a result, cranky.
Carpal Tunnel
A word of warning to you reading: go check out a good page on computer/desk ergonomics before you end up like me.
After years of working at a desk mostly made by me (ie, a plank of wood atop two advantageously-placed file cabinets), my shoulder has revolted. I’ve got pain in the whole right side of my back which is acute in my shoulder, just under my shoulder, and in my neck, pain that runs all the way down my arm and into my wrist and hand.
Bad timing considering I’m now two months away from my book deadline.
Alas, a couple of days ago I discovered thanks to the above diagram that my hands were too high. I bought one of those under-desk keyboard drawers, which came with a wrist rest, and so far, so good. I also aligned my monitor so it’s right in front of me – it was off to the right – and remember to sit as far back in my chair as I can. I think what got me was leaning forward, to the right, into my mouse. I’m just hoping that slowly it will go away, and I’ve immersed myself in a world of hot baths, massages, acupuncture and pain killers.
At least I’m not a hatter.
Thanks to Deborah
I just wanted to especially thank Deborah for her kindness and help with my ongoing insanity. I’ve developed some major neck/back/shoulder pain (a combination of a bad computer setup, one fallen arch, and – oh, stress, for some reason) and we all know how hard it is to get a doctor on the phone! But Deborah is always ready with advice and help.
She’s done it before, too, and I’m insanely grateful. I literally couldn’t work for a few days there – leaning forward at all was incredibly painful but is oh, just kind of required when one is writing and editing.
The Plan – Two Months Later
Ah, the result of eating turkey meatloaf is that I’ve lost 11 lbs. since I started this plan on 3/19/06, and taken off a total of 4.7″.
I admire any of you who have had to lose 25 lbs or more ever, in your life. I’ve never had this much to lose before, and I am really really sick of this sterile way of eating – measuring everything & all. I’m about a third of the way through my weight loss, so if I keep losing it at about the same rate, I’ll reach my goal weight in about four months – or by our 5th wedding anniversary.
It’s kind of nice to look forward to, but in the meantime – ugh to green beans already!
Alas, Miss Emma…
Miss Emma didn’t make it through the night.
I feel like an idiot crying over a fish, but still, we had her for about seven years, longer than we’ve had the boys. I was just so used to her being there. She was always such a cheerful fish, and always said hello (unlike the sharks, who don’t seem to know we exist).
Oh, Miss Emma. We will miss you.
Now I have to figure out what exactly you do with a deceased fish – or what exactly we will do. She deserves some ceremony, no matter how small.