Betty’s on her way to LA for her first NCTE board meeting, and I’m at home wondering how I’m going to occupy myself without my lovely partner around. That the board meeting was scheduled thoughtlessly on Valentine’s Day weekend just gives me more of an idea of how much trans-activists think about partners. Phooey.
On top of that, I just posted the very last entry I’d written in my trans-erotica story! (Don’t tell the CDs who are logging on just to read it, since I’m going to enjoy leaving them hanging.) When I first wrote it, quite a while back, I gave it to Betty, and she read it, and she said (and I quote), “It’s almost too literary to get off to.” So I stopped, since the whole point was for her to say “I madly want to make love to you right now, especially since I can’t believe how incredibly lucky I am to have a wife who can find my transness a turn-on.” Unfortunately, no-one had gotten Betty a copy of the script in advance, and she had to improv. Betty hates improv, for a reason.
So, on this lonely weekend when half of the world is taking time out to make love, I’m supposed to write more of a trans-erotic story that my own lovely tranny couldn’t get off to, for the sake of all you, whoever you are, out there.
Sometimes, life is all about timing. It’s very hard to come up with what happens next when I can’t go ask Betty to put on some thigh-highs for me, you know, to inspire me. Luckily Betty saw fit to leave me a rose, and arranged for two eunuchs* to share my bed, so I feel a little like a well-loved harem girl. Or something like that.
Buying things for your love for Valentine’s Day is nice (and is sure to be appreciated, no matter which gender you are), but giving your lover a few home-made “coupons” for “services” is even better. Best: give him or her or hir or ze a sex coupon, specifically for something you don’t love doing but that really turns them on! Unfortunately Betty forgot to leave mine with the rose she left, though I’m sure she’ll be bringing me one back from L.A. And no, I’m not telling what the coupon might be for. (But she better know!)
If you’re alone for Valentine’s Day, indulge yourself with a haircut, a bath, music you love (played as loud as you want, of course) and a phonecall to your most-recently-heartbroken friend, who probably needs to hear from you.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Continue reading “So… yeah.”
Femme Fever Ball
Karen of Femme Fever, who has been doing a lot great work with the trans community for the past 10 years, is hosting the First Ever Femme Fever Ball, to take place on February 26th. Dinner, a fashion show, dancing are all included with the price of a ticket (which you need to buy before 2/22). Please see the Femme Fever site for more details.
Karen offers transformation services as well as support groups for all within the trans community. Again, see her site for more details.
Protest or Support?
It occurred to me that around this time last year, emails and T newsgroups and mailing lists and blogs were inundated with protests about the nomination of Michael Bailey’s The Man Who Would Be Queen for a Lambda Literary Award. I was against the nomination as were so many of us, and the driving force behind the protest was pretty remarkable, if not always polite.
However, not one trans website I’ve found has actually posted anything about this year’s nominees. I noticed, of course, because I’m one of the people whose book has been nominated, in the transgender category, along with the likes of Morty Diamond, Mariette Pathy Allen, Jamison Green and Julie Anne Peters. There are some other trans writers up for awards in other categories, and yet I haven’t really read anything about it.
Did the Bailey controversy end up nullifying the awards for the trans community? Or are we just way better at protesting than supporting the writers and educators who are doing good work?
So here, without further ado, are a few of the book award nominees for the Lambda Lit Award:
In the Nonfiction Anthology category:
That’s Revolting!: Queer Strategies for Resisting Assimilation edited by Mattilda, a.k.a Matt Bernstein Sycamore, Soft Skull Press
In the Children’s/Young Adult category:
Luna by Julie Anne Peters, Little, Brown Books for Young Readers (which was also a finalist for the National Book Award this year)
In the Drama/Theatre category:
I am My Own Wife by Doug Wright, Farrar, Straus & Giroux (which has won so many other awards, like the Pulitzer and the Tony, you’ll have to check the website for the entire list)
In the Transgender/GenderQueer category:
Becoming a Visible Man by Jamison Green, Vanderbilt University Press (which also won CLAGS’ Sylvia Rivera award)
From The Inside Out: Radical Gender Transformation, FTM and Beyond edited by Morty Diamond, Manic D Press
Luna by Julie Anne Peters, Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
My Husband Betty: Love, Sex and Life with a Crossdresser by Helen Boyd, Thunder’s Mouth Press
The Gender Frontier by Mariette Pathy Allen, Kehrer Verlag
2nd Annual Trans Issues Week at Yale
I was part of the first annual TransWeek at Yale and was more than impressed with the (undergrad) organizer of the event, Loren Krywanczyk. I’m happy to be part of it once again, and thanks to all the CDs (& one wife) who are willing to speak.
The second annual TRANS ISSUES WEEK AT YALE
February 21 – 25, 2005
Sponsored by the Larry Kramer Initiative for Lesbian and Gay Studies
Press Release
It is still widely believed that all individuals are simply male or female, and that there is no fluidity whatsoever between these two supposed polar opposites. Likewise, many Americans still ascribe to the common misconception that an individual’s biological sex is necessarily the same as her/his gender identity or performance. The notion of binary sex and gender categories pervades modern society and exerts pressure on all individuals, regardless of sex or sexuality, to adhere to specific standards of behavior and of masculinity and femininity based on their physiologies. Transgendered and intersexed individuals, among others who transcend stereotypical gender boundaries, demonstrate the inadequacy of these binary systems.
Trans Issues Week at Yale is an annual speaker series which explores gender and transgender identity through a variety of both formal and informal events. It will incorporate concepts of fluidity and of a spectrum of gender and sexuality. Events will shed light upon the intersections of gender, sex, class, and race and will illuminate the distinctions and overlaps between sex, gender, and sexuality. Founded and organized entirely by personal undergraduate efforts to increase campus and New Haven awareness about gender identity and the values of gender diversity, Trans Issues Week reflects and contributes to a relatively new wave of thought about gender, sex, and sexuality.
The second annual TRANS ISSUES WEEK AT YALE
February 21 – 25, 2005
Sponsored by the Larry Kramer Initiative for Lesbian and Gay Studies at Yale
Shana Agid
“No Superman: Troubling Representations of Trans ‘Masculinity'”
Monday, February 21 7 pm
Harkness Hall, 100 Wall Street, room 309
Through a close look at Loren Cameron’s Body Alchemy, artist, activist, and cultural critic Shana Agid addresses the construction of “appropriate” FTM (female to male) transgender narratives, and the place, or placelessness, of race and power in popular images and stories about trans identities and in the making of “real” transmen.
“Part-time Ladies: Crossdressers Tell Their Stories”
A forum of heterosexual crossdressers moderated by author Helen Boyd
Tuesday, February 22 7 pm
Yale Women’s Center, 198 Elm Street
A forum of male, heterosexual-identified crossdressers and their partners describe the intersections of sexuality, sex and gender in their lives.
“Transitioning on Campus”
A panel of trans-identified college students
Wednesday, February 23 4:30 pm
Harkness Hall, 100 Wall Street, room 309
New Haven college students discuss the experience of transitioning and genderbending on campus. The panel will include the perspectives of trans-identified individuals, their close friends and significant others.
Julanne Tutty, “My Experience as Intersexual”
Friday, February 25 4 pm
Yale Women’s Center, 198 Elm Street
Meeting Miss Vera
As quite a surprise to both me and Betty, the always lovely (& eternally amused) Mariette Pathy Allen decided to bring a “friend” to the New Year’s Day performance of “The Trial.”
Mariette does not have average friends! She brought Miss Veronica Vera, the one and only.
Finally, after these many years, we got to meet Miss Vera. I wanted to thank her for the sex-positive work she’s done, aside from the tranny work she’d done with the “Finishing School for Boys Who Want To Be Girls,” of course. It was her first book that alerted me to the fact that some CDs do have erotic tastes for boys when en femme. I remember reading that, and comparing it to what various websites had to say on the subject, and realizing that Miss Vera had no reason to lie (while websites put up by CDs, well, might – especially if they knew their wives were reading them!)
So we met her: as curvaceous as she is smart, Miss Vera proved to be a lot of fun, just as you’d expect. We accidentally ran into each other on our way into/out of the Ladies’ Room, and compiled about a lifetime’s worth of sex stories into about 11 minutes’ chat. Then we rejoined everyone else; we did manage to take a few pictures, but only with Betty’s camera, & the quality is pretty sucky (though Betty has promised me photoshop’d versions forthwith.)
It turns out Miss Vera is also going to be delivering the Banquet Speech at this year’s First Event, so if you’re in the Boston area (or otherwise have the time and money) don’t miss it. She’s a powerhouse of an ally, indulgent of most sexual proclivities, and absolutely gorgeous.
< < A very blurry picture of Miss Veronica Vera and Mariette Pathy Allen (with us squeezed inbetween).
Board Betty
As some of you may know, Betty was being considered for membership on the board of a nation trans organization.
Tonight, we met with NCTE Director Mara Keisling who confirmed that Betty will indeed be one of the NCTE’s Board Members. NCTE (National Center for Transgender Equality) “is a social justice organization dedicated to advancing the equality of transgender people through advocacy, collaboration and empowerment.” So says their website. We’ve met with Mara Keisling a few times and have been continually impressed by her dedication, political savvy, and her wit.
Please do go check out their website, read more about them, and if you can – make a donation! (Tell them Helen & Betty sent you, too!)
Reading Judith Butler on the D Train
I know I’m not the only one excited by a Christmas gift of gender theory – not only, but not common, either. A slim volume, bound in oily paper.
But how is it – despite my excitement – that once I start to read I start to yawn? Radical performativity and challenges to authorship make me want to stretch like my cat on our bed, him in the sun through our back bedroom window, me on the D train, rays streaming in off the white chips of ice in the East River and on the sludge piles on the Brooklyn side. White light/no heat.
Despite theory, on the train I name genders. Shy momma’s boy, effete hipster, resilient Malay matriarch. Aren’t we all different gendered, even while we pass for one or the other? Does the crisis only happen when everyone sees “man” when one feels “woman,” or vice versa? Or do we just assume that everyone only sees two, like some kind of post-apocalyptic god, cleaving some to the left, some to the right? What do most people see? I try to remember back, from when I didn’t think of gender, and what comes to me is a time when I was on a different train, the Long Island Railroad, and I was about 17. An aging conductor was the first to take my monthly ticket, and he punched it M. I know I changed it later, but I also know I’d wondered if I should, or not. Would all the conductors think me male, or had the lights blinked off for a moment for one semi-blind conductor? If I had it changed, and they still read me as M, – what then? (I had it changed, thinking somehow that my combat boots and shaved head and flannel shirts would still, somehow, by some miracle, be read as F.)
No one reads me now as M, but I still know I’m only passing.
Partner Research
Hello all!
I could use your help.
I’ve posted a questionnaire for partners/SOs/SOFFAs of transpeople in order to help aid and direct my research for two upcoming essays and possibly/probably for the next book.
I’ve posted it in the MHB Message Boards and would love for people to post it on other message boards, Yahoo! groups, and listservs.
Thanks to all!
Helen Boyd
Book Television (Canada)
For the month of January, Book Television in Canada will be “sexing up” their shows, which includes an interview with a male proponent of cunnilingus, Tom Wolfe, and us!
Find out more about the show at the Book Televsion website: www.booktelevision.com/richlerink/index.cfm
Transgender Activists Celebrate Victory in New York City
Transgender advocates and activists are celebrating the release of Guidelines Regarding Gender Identity Discrimination from the New York City Commission on Human Rights this week. These guidelines interpret the Human Rights Law and are designed to educate the public about the prohibition on discrimination based on gender identity and expression that became part of New York City human rights law with the passage of Int. No. 24, the transgender rights bill signed into law by Mayor Michael Bloomberg as Local Law 3 of 2002 in April of that year.
Continue reading “Transgender Activists Celebrate Victory in New York City”