Helen Boyd Kramer's journal on gender and stuff
Welcome to any listeners from Air America who are popping over here after my interview on Nicole Sandler’s show. Here’s a link to the article by Jenny Boylan from the NYT.
I’d like to reiterate that the trans community, for the most part, is very, very invested in making sure same sex marriage becomes legal everywhere. For couples like us, & other (trans) couples unlike us, it would bring a huge collective sigh of relief.
I’ll be on Air America Live tomorrow, 12:15 PM EST, talking about my unusual marriage, & yes, there is a live feed.
(Thanks to Jenny Boylan for the opportunity!)
It’s damned pathetic that same sex marriage isn’t a done deal in NYS yet, but senators are still waffling? Get with the program, folks. You’re on the wrong side of history. (via Queerty)
Senator Tom Harken (D- IA) has come around to accepting civil marriage equality, according to Pam’s House Blend.
I think it took courage to admit, as he did, that he was wrong when he signed onto DOMA:
“We all grow as we get older, and we learn things and we become more sensitive to people and people’s lives,” Harkin said. “And the more I’ve looked at that, I’ve grown to think differently about how people – how we should live. And I guess I’m at the point that, you know – I’m to that point of live and let live,” Harkin said.
Amazingly enough, DOMA was 13 years ago, & while many were optimistic then that we could turn the tide, I’m not sure any of us expected how quickly we would.
You can thank Sen. Tom Harkin via his website.
This is the text of the talk I gave at the Liberty Conference on May 2nd, 2009:
How We Love You: Let Us Count the Ways
There are partners who are male, female, and trans; there are partners who met their trans person before the trans person knew what was going on; there are partners who married crossdressers who had sworn off crossdressing who purged and then dressed and then purged and then dressed again; there are partners who met their husbands crossdressed; there are partners who met their trans person during transition; there are partners who met their trans person long after transition; there are partners who didn’t know their trans person was trans when they met.
You, the individuals who are in love, were in love, who are seeking companionship and partnership and occasionally a good spanking, are said to be like snowflakes. Flawless Mother Sabrina told me that one night at the now defunct Ina’s Silver Swan, and she was right. Each of your stories is unique, even when there are similarities; each of you realizes your transness, as I like to call it, in a different way: some crossdress, others do drag, others transition. Some do all three, and others do none of these, but you express your genders in some other way. But you have your stories, your characters in movies, even if and when they are comically or tragically or unfairly drawn, but those you love have — well, we’ve got a machete and a spot on the edge of the wood we mean to get through.
There’s been a lot going on:
Quite a week for the LGBT community!
I love me some drama: Rasputina & The Dresden Dolls, both some kind of merger of pop and weimar. I especially love the Rasputina lyrics: Neglected girls should worry? / That’s what god made sailors for!
& Yes, I did hear “If your kisses won’t hold the man you love, your tears won’t bring him back” in a slightly different way viz my own marriage, but it still held up as truth, no?
Today the opposing sides face off in California State Supreme Court about Prop 8. In their corner, the detestable Ken Starr; in ours, the inimitable Shannon Minter.
My friend Megan has already sussgested the headline: Minter Blows Starr Away.
I have absolute confidence in Shannon Minter.
The NAACP has been one of our strongest allies in the fight against Proposition 8 in California. The national NAACP Legal Defense & Educational Fund (LDF) and the California branch of the NAACP joined other civil rights groups in filing a major brief before the California Supreme Court in support of equality, and LDF recently urged the California legislature to enact resolutions calling for the invalidation of Prop 8.
The NAACP is getting some push-back for these efforts. Now is the time for us to support them and show that coalition politics goes both ways. Please join me in expressing your support for their statement of equality to your local NAACP branch:
We are not alone in this fight. Let’s show that we know how to step up to the plate when others step up for us.
I won’t be at the Femme Fever Ball I blogged about yesterday because I’ll be speaking in Milwaukee, but I will be back on the East Coast this spring, in early May, in Philly, for the Liberty Conference. Some of my fellow presenters include:
Dr. Richard Doctor, Arlene Lev, Dr. Jeffrey Spiegel, Dr. Sherman Leis, Dr. Jennifer Burnett, Dr. Sandra Simmons, Dr. James Thomas, Dr. Richard Hauer, Dr. Mark Zukowski, Dr. Maureen Osborne, Rev. Karla Fleshman, Allison Lang, Jan Brown, Stephanie Battaglino, Mona Rae Mason, Lady Ellen Melissa Clark, and Georgie Jessup
I’ll be speaking at the Saturday Luncheon about relationships in a talk called “How We Love You: Let Us Count the Ways” which will address issues of identity, intimacy, compromise, sex, family, and marriage.
You can read more & register at www.transeventsusa.org.